Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Razor on Strike?

If you were here Sunday you may have noticed that I did not shave this week. You had to look real close, mind you, but it was in fact noticeable. You see, I have never been one who has been able to grow a full mustache or beard. It’s really bummed me out. Some guys can shave in the morning and have a full beard by 5pm that afternoon. That’s not me. I use a razor but a warm hot dog would probably accomplish the same thing.

Actually, I hate shaving. Boy, am I glad I’m not a woman!! At least all I have to shave is my face. My hate for shaving probably stems back from when I first started. I had horrible acne as a teenager, thus all the scars on my face. Unfortunately no one had yet invented the 4-wheel drive razor so every time I shaved it was a new adventure in blood and pain. And, of course, the after shaving splash of cooling cologne definitely added insult to injury. So, I have never really enjoyed the daily grind of shaving.

I tried once to grow a beard about 6 or 7 years ago. I made it three weeks. Although it was nice to not have to get the Edge Gel out every day, it didn’t take time for me to get tired of this substance on my face that didn’t even come close to resembling anything near a mustache or a beard…so I shaved. It actually disappointed my wife. She was growing accustomed to it. Imagine that! What a woman!

So over the Thanksgiving holiday, I never pulled out my razor. I had every intention to break out the cream and blade last Saturday night so that my handsome face was again smooth and presentable last Sunday, but I decided not to. Why? I’m not really sure. Maybe it was pure laziness. Maybe it is some form of pent up rebellion in my life stemming back to my childhood. Maybe it’s a new seeker-friendly ministry philosophy which will allow me to write a best selling book I'll call, The Razor Driven Church. Is age 42 ripe for a mid-life crisis? I really can’t explain it. I just didn’t shave. Maybe you noticed. In fact, it may have just been part of some of your dinner conversations last Sunday after church.

So now what? Now it’s decision time. Do I dare try again? Do I dare let my Fusion Razor and Edge Gel sit in my bathroom drawer and not pull it out or do I return to the daily grind of shaving? I’m not sure of the answer yet but I have decided this one thing. If I go back to shaving it will happen by this Sunday and you will know by my smooth acne-scarred face when you come to church. However, if I don’t shave this week then I have decided that I am in it for the long haul. That’s right. If I don’t shave this week it won’t be just a passing fancy or horrid experimentation. If my face isn’t completely smooth come this Sunday than you will not see it smooth again until….are your ready for this? (drum roll, please)…until Easter Sunday morning, March 23, 2008.

That’s right! If I do not shave this week then I am committed to trying to grow a beard for four full months…from Thanksgiving to Easter. There will be no retreats! There will be no reserves! There just might be a few regrets but, oh well, sometimes you just got to live dangerously. So what will the verdict be? You won’t know before Sunday morning because I won’t know until then either.

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